Writing: A Lot Like Love?

When it’s going well, writing is exactly like being in love: the fever, the passion, the need to spend every waking moment with your loved one. But, just like love, there are down times, moments when you see the flaws and not the positive. Relationships take work, we know that, but do we think to take the time to nurture our relationship with our writing careers?

Weeks can go by where I don’t write a word. If my writing was a person, I would never go a week without calling. So how do we fix it when the bond with our writing starts to break?


1. Make Time.

When you’re an amateur writer, it can be easy to think of writing as a luxury. That is, the thing you do when you have free time after your day job, after cleaning the house, walking the dog, spending time with your boyfriend or girlfriend or remembering to call your parents. It isn’t. If you want to be a pro someday, or even if you just want to be a better amateur, writing needs time. Regular time. Miss a week and you’ll be rusty when you come back to it. Give it some time every day, whatever time you can manage. Even five minutes can keep the fire alive.

2. Remember the good times.

Just like it helps to remember the first date you went on when your partner has used the last of the milk without telling you, it helps to remember why you put yourself through this at all. Most of us do not technically “need” to write. It doesn’t pay our bills, doesn’t advance our day jobs or enhance our romantic relationships. But, at the same time, every writer has to write. For some reason, it’s in your blood. Remember this when sitting down at your desk feels like a death sentence.

3. Make a commitment.

No, I’m not talking about being “married to your work.” No one wants to be a workaholic. But it’s important that you know where things are headed, or at least where you want them to be headed. Keep the goal of publication in mind; hone your writing so that if an opportunity comes to light, you’re ready.


Writing won’t give you the same things a relationship with a person does, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t deserve time and consideration. Happy writer, happy life after all.


Helen Dring is a fiction writer from Liverpool, England. She is studying for an MA in Creative Writing and is currently writing her first novel. She likes fairy tales, ghost stories and modern history.

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